Indestructible
by EJ 12212012
Summary: Jasper isn't proud of his past, but it made him who he is today. It reminds him to be a better person, and he wouldn't change it for anything. Sometimes, though, he can't help but remember...


*****IMPORTANT*****  
>This is a one-shot that gets into Jasper's thoughts at different parts of his time after his change but before the Cullens. This is more about his thoughts and emotions than actual events. The <em>italics <em>between paragraphs are the lyrics to the song Indestructible by Disturbed. They are meant to be a part of the story, so please, DO NOT SKIP OVER THEM.  
>I do not own the song lyrics, nor do I own Twilight.<br>Please enjoy.

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><p><span>Jasper's P.O.V.<span> (4190 words):

I was to meet Maria in a cave today just outside of Leon, Mexico. The newborns were waiting outside for my command. I was waiting for her's. Her ultimate goal was to retake Mexico City, and we were close to doing just that. The city had been her's 64 years ago, but had been overtaken when her last second-in-command had been killed. This time, Maria had started in Dallas, Texas and headed further south as she grew stronger. It was slow moving until she hit Galveston, Texas in1861 while the town was being evacuated. She changed me there, and in a short 58 years, I had stretched her empire from Tepic, Mexico to Fort Worth, Texas. I was unstoppable, and everyone feared Major J. Whitlock.

I smelled her then, and I turned to see her in the mouth of the cave.

_Another mission the powers have called me away_  
><em>Another time to carry the colors again<em>

"Mi guerrero, they have a new name for you." Maria purred, walking up to me. She ran her hand down my chest lightly.

"Who does?" I asked, staying expressionless. In the first couple years of this life, I worshiped this woman. She was my creator, my sire, my lover, and my **keeper**... I hated the thought of being owned by a creature I could so easily dispose of, but I couldn't imagine killing my superior. That was treason, and I would always be a soldier at heart.

"The other sires and second-in-commands, of course." She smiled, and I felt how proud she was. She wasn't proud of me though. She was proud of herself for having me.

_My motivation an oath I've sworn to defend  
>To win the honor of coming back home again<em>

"They no longer call me the Major?" I questioned, actually finding myself intrigued. What could they possibly be calling me?

"You will always be the feared Major J. Whitlock, but I quite like this new title as well." Maria giggled and walked to stand behind me. I fought my instincts that were telling me to turn around and remove her head. "They are calling you Mars."

"Mars." I repeated after a short silence, trying it on my tongue. "The God of War?"

"Yes." hissed Maria, waves of lust, anticipation, excitement, and pride oozing out of her perfect body. I wanted to kill her. "Say it again, mi guerrero."

"Mars." said I, indulging her. Maria was standing in front of me again, and she smiled.

_No explanation will matter after we begin_

"There is an army of 32 today." She informed me suddenly, and I raised an eyebrow.

"So many? Do they not fear the Volturi?" I said, slightly surprised. The most newborns Maria even dared to dream of making at a time was 23.

"It seems they fear you more, mi amor." She laughed and exited the cave. "Come. I wish to watch you ready my army."

_Unlock the dark destroyer that's buried within  
>My true vocation and now my unfortunate friend<em>

Taking a deep breath and closing my eyes, I give myself over to my inner demon without fight. My inner demon was always lurking just under the surface, looking for a threat. Maria was the only one I didn't have to worry about. She needed me too much to kill me. She depended upon me. The newborns, however, didn't think or care. I had to be at my best (or worst, depending on how you looked at it) to deal with them.

I opened my eyes and exit the cave. I stand tall, and the newborns flinch when I come into view. Their fear and hatred seep into my skin. The demon is at full attention now.

_You will discover a war you're unable to win_

"Line up." When a couple hesitate, I let loose a warning growl. They scramble into formation without me needing to use my gift at all. I walked down the line, not worrying about turning my back on them. If any of them began to feel defiant, they would be in pieces before they took a step. "We have quite the fight ahead of us today. Those of you that have survived for a couple battles will understand that 16 is the average number for an army. Today, we shall be fighting 32. Make peace with God. Take a hunt. We set out in two hours, and I expect y'all back in one and a half. I will track you down and kill you slowly if you do not return. Dismissed." They scattered.

_I'll have you know  
>That I've become indestructible<em>

When they were gone, I turned to Maria. She had not moved throughout the whole ordeal. She walked toward me slowly. I could feel her lust and possessiveness, and it took all I had not to rip her arm off. Oh, how I wished I could belong to no one but myself.

_Determination that is incorruptible  
>From the other side a terror to behold<br>Annihilation will be unavoidable_

"We have an hour and a half, I hear." Maria whispered seductively. She pulled me to her by my shirt collar and attacked my mouth with fervor. Swallowing my hatred and disgust, I kissed her back. It was then, as she began to take off our clothes and lead me back to the cave, that I decided I would leave this place one day. If I ever found a way to escape her lust, possession, and love of death, I would do it without hesitation. I felt my hope fall as Maria dug her nails down my spine. Even if someone knew of a life like that, who would care enough to give such a gift to me?

_Every broken enemy will know  
>That their opponent had to be invincible<em>

It was now time for the battle. We were standing in a field at three in the morning, waiting for the other army to arrive. I was on front lines, and Maria was hidden behind us. It was no wonder she had only four scars. She hid behind her newborns the same way they hid behind me. My loathing for her rose, and the newborns shuddered in fear as I accidentally projected my anger.

Every newborn had returned from their hunts. No surprises there. Death by my hands would be worse than anything they'd find on the battlefield, and they knew that. In a way, I was glad Maria pissed me off so much. I'd have more to take out on the newborns, a better chance of survival. Although, I was starting to wonder if I even had the ability to die. I had yet to find any vampire that was a challenge against my gift or combat skills.

_Take a last look around while you're alive  
>I'm an indestructible master of war<em>

The other second-in-command walked through the treeline with a confident smirk on his face. His emotions told the truth. He was shaking in his boots. I couldn't help but chuckle under my breath. He heard it, of course, and determination flared inside him. He gave the signal, and he charged with 31 newborns around him.

_Another reason, another cause for me to fight  
>Another fuse uncovered now for me to light<em>

_My dedication to all that I've sworn to protect_

I lifted up my hand, indicating for the newborns under my command to wait. Just as they were getting too close for comfort, I gave the attack command and attempted to drown them in fear and hesitation as I ran to meet them. They paused and stumbled just as we reached them. Regrettably, the fight was over quickly. Eight scars are added to my collection, but I killed 14 of them myself as well as their second-in-command. We killed all of them, including their two sires. The territory was now ours.

"Get rid of these remaining six. We start over tomorrow." Maria commands in my ear. Her death sentence is nearly silent, and I know that they had no chance of hearing. I nod, and she takes off to scent the perimeter and stake her claim on the new territory. I call the six newborns to attention.

_I carry out my orders without a regret_

I attack them. They put up a good fight. I trained them myself, after all. I get a few more scars, and I get a chunk of my arm removed. That reattaches quickly, and after they enter the fire, I find myself alone.

I stare at my scars. I remember every face and the emotions they felt as I ripped them apart. They haunt me, in a way. They remind me of the monster I've become. I have avenged all of my scars, save one. I touch my neck, feeling the mark left by Maria when she stopped my heart from beating and gave me this half-life filled with destruction, greed, hatred, possession, and fear.

_My declaration embedded deep under my skin  
>A permanent reminder of how it began<em>

I lose control of the beast, and he roars. A red mist overtakes my vision. I feel myself projecting every negative emotion, desperate to get them away from me, but they are mine. I cannot escape myself or the horrors around me. I should belong to no one!

I tear trees to the ground, pulverize rocks and gravel, and I soon find myself galavanting toward the next nearest army. Maria hadn't planned on going after this city for another week, but I didn't care. I needed to kill. I needed to rave and rampage. I needed to do the only thing I knew how to do. I needed to take commands from the only thing I knew could keep me from the fire, the only thing that might keep me at all sane. I must let the demon within me take control.

_No hesitation when I am commanded to strike  
>You need to know that you're in for the fight of your life<em>

I don't know how long the beast was in control or how many I killed while under the red cloud, but I snapped out of my haze in mid-hunt. The blood going down my throat shocked me enough that I injected my venom and jumped back. The man fell to the floor. It wasn't until his screams began that I'd realized what I'd done. He was changing. I had to either kill him now, or I'd need to let the change complete. I'd never created anyone before.

_You will be shown  
>How I've become indestructible<em>

I leaned down to snap his neck, but I stopped as his emotions washed over me. I couldn't do it. I hadn't felt sick to my stomach since before the fire that stopped my heart, but just thinking about killing this man made me want to vomit. What was so different about this one?

_Determination that is incorruptible  
>From the other side a terror to behold<br>Annihilation will be unavoidable_

I felt deeper into his emotions and flinched. The pain of my change was not something I had enjoyed, and I hated feeling it from all the newborns Maria would change. In that aspect, this one was no different. Then I felt it.

He was filled with confidence, surety, expectancy, and no anxiety whatsoever. I was beyond shocked. It was as if he knew what was happening to him. It was like he almost understood, yet that couldn't be possible. How would he know what he was becoming? How could he be feeling such pain and be confident and free of anxiety? I had no answers. All I knew was that I could not kill him. He would complete the change, I would be his sire, and he would join the army. Perhaps in time, I'd find an explanation for his emotions.

_Every broken enemy will know  
>That their opponent had to be invincible<em>

Lifting him to carry him over my shoulder, I began to follow my scent back to the cave. I soon realized that I didn't have to follow my scent. There was a path of destruction and death leading back to the cave as well. I set fire to the town and area of the forest that I had annihilated. I really didn't need the Volturi coming after me. My scent trail was only one day old, so I'd been gone for just over 24 hours. That wasn't bad at all. Maria probably wouldn't even punish me. I knew that no matter how long I was gone, Maria would wait for me to return. I always came back. I had to. Where else was there to go?

_Take a last look around while your alive  
>I'm an indestructible master of war<em>

I got back, and Maria had 17 vampires changing in the rubble where the cave had once been. I set my creation away from the rest of them, and felt Maria's curiosity. I lifted my head to meet her gaze.

"What's this, Major?" She questioned, glancing at him before looking back at me.

"There's somethin' about his emotions." I answered truthfully. "I don't know what it is, but I killed the whole town before his blood shocked me back to reality. I need to keep this one."

_I'm indestructible  
>Determination that is incorruptible<em>

"Whatever you say, mi amor. I have never heard you speak so many words at once, so he must mean something to you." Maria said with a twisted smile. "I see potential in him anyway. He's a good choice. He'll be a nice addition."

I said nothing, and only the screams of the 18 army recruits broke the silence. I sat beside my first creation for over a day before Maria's newborns began to wake up. I used my gift to work them into a fearful subordination.

This was Maria's favorite part. She enjoyed watching me force the wild and rabid, thirst driven beasts to their knees with my gift. She enjoyed it, and I could feel that it was the power she liked. She would begin to throw off lust as she watched me kill the ones that were too feral and uncontrollable. She would smile as I'd snarl and ensnare them into submission. It was her entertainment. This was her game, and I was the winning card. Good thing for her, I liked it too. With the newborns, I had control over something. I wasn't just Maria's pet assassin. I was the one the newborns feared, not Maria. I was the one.

_From the other side a terror to behold  
>Annihilation will be unavoidable<em>

When I felt they were controlled enough to listen, I gave the same speech I always did.

"You have entered another realm. Here, you follow me. You do everything I say. You addresses me as Major only, and any that disobey, or even think about disobeyin', will be slaughtered like cattle." I looked each of them in the eyes, sending them fear and faith. "I will train you, and you will fight for your life until you lose it. Fight hard enough, and you might live to see the new moon, maybe even the next. I have lasted nearly sixty years.

"In this new life, it could be your enemies or your allies that send you into the flames. If every one of you listen to me, it will only be your enemies." I turned to Maria and sent her slight waves of bloodlust and question. She nodded and I turned my full attention back to the newborns. "Our sire and creator have gifts for all of you. This will be your only gift. After this, you must work for your meals." Maria moved a huge rock from the opening of the cave, and the humans began to run and stumble out in fear before seeing the newborns. "Go." At my word, I let my gift off of them, and they were upon their meals in the next second. I pulled two humans aside and used my gift to keep the newborns away from them. These two were for my creation when he woke up.

When they finished feeding, I put the last two humans back into the cave and started the newborns on spars. I could do this from a distance. It was easy to manipulate their emotions to choose when they went on the offense of defense, whether they fought calm or angry or while in pain, or when they were to stop. I could control all this with my gift, so I did. Maria left for a hunt after a day, and I sat beside the form of the being I'd sired.

_Every broken enemy will know  
>That their opponent had to be invincible<em>

His heartbeat picked up, and I stood to stand a couple feet away. I kept the newborns distracted sparing. He gasped, and his heart died. He flashed to his feet, and his gaze shot directly to me. At first, his emotions were exactly what I'd expect from any newborn. He was terrified at the sight of my scars, confused, thirsty, and just all around restless. Just as I was about to calm him down with my gift, his emotions changed with a strangely comforting tingling.

Suddenly, he was calm, submissive, and patient. He was still thirsty, but that was the only thing normal about his emotions.

"I'm Major J. Whitlock." I said, surprising myself with the introduction. "What's your name?"

"I'm Peter, and I have every intention to do exactly as you say, Jasper." He replied, shocking me so much that I lost control on the newborns, and one came at me. Peter leaped to my defense, pinning him to the ground and removing his head (which, I admit, only surprised me more). I shook off the shock and retook control of the newborns.

This shouldn't be possible! How did he know what to do when the newborn attacked? More importantly, how did he know my name? Not even Maria knew my first name. I'd always simply gone by the name I'd enrolled with for the army.

_Take a last look around while your alive  
>I am indestructible... indestructible<em>

"If you plan on doing everythin' I say, let's start with the name. I'm Major or sir. You are not to use that name in front of anyone." I commanded, sending him my seriousness. "Second, how on God's green earth do you know that name?"

"I'm not sure, Major." Peter replied, his emotions revealing it was true. "Since the burning started I've just... known things."

"It's a gift then." I muttered to myself under my breath. I'd never heard of anything like that before. The ability of randomly having knowledge sounded a bit strange. "I want you to keep this strange talent a secret. We need to find out more about it before we tell Maria."

"She's your superior." Peter stated, and it wasn't a question. He knew. I nearly growled.

_Indestructible  
>Determination that is incorruptible<em>

"Yes." I replied through gritted teeth. I was done talking to Peter. I'd end up ripping him apart if I didn't send him away. "What else do you know?"

"I know I'm a vampire. I know your gift and what you mean by gift. There are two humans waiting behind that rock for me. I'll have to train well and kill for more blood. When I finish with that, you'll send me to train with the rest of them. You created me, and your creator will be returning in five minutes. She'll have you send us out to battle Mexico City within the hour. I also know I'll survive this for three years before something happens, but I don't know what that something is." Peter rattled off without pause.

"We're goin' to Mexico City within the hour?" I repeated, and he nodded. "Hurry and feed. I need to step up the trainin'. Jump right in when you're done. Three years in this hell hole is a long time."

"Yet you'll have to endure sixty-seven before you escape." His words caused me to send out my hope to the army, and they began to fight harder. I cataloged that fact in the back of my mind, but the majority of my brain was still processing Peter's sentence. Peter went to the cave and fed before joining the newborns. He was good, damn good. I felt slight relief at that. I hadn't had a real conversation like that in decades. I liked Peter. I knew it was dangerous to get attached, but I couldn't help it.

Nine more years living this way. I could do that. I'd fight harder than ever now. I'd get out one day. I had something to live for. In nine years, I'd be free...

_From the other side a terror to behold  
>Annihilation will be unavoidable<em>

What do you know, Peter was right. Within the hour, we stood on the outskirts of the city, waiting for the army to come.

Maria had picked up on Peter's fighting skills right away. She called him a natural. She said he reminded her of myself as a newborn, although I'd been more uncontrolled. That, I believed. Maria thought he'd have a title by the time tonight's battle was over.

The real surprise had come when she placed him on my right flank. No one ever flanked me. I went in alone, and I came out alone. She said he was different, and that if he did well that she'd be keeping him beyond his first year. I simply went along with it. What can I say? The know-it-all was growing on me.

The second-in-command came into view with the newborns behind him. He looked back and forth between Peter and myself before laughing.

"It looks as if the Major has a Captain." The moment he said it, I knew it'd stick. I would be the Major, and Peter would be the Captain.

Two years later, Peter brought a woman for me to change. I almost didn't. His emotions were dangerous. It was obvious she was his mate. Since Peter had become like a brother to me, I changed her anyway.

Charlotte was lethal. She had no real gift, but her tracking skills and unique fighting style put her way above the others. She became my First Lieutenant in her first week and took up my left flank. It took less than a month for the word to spread. Major J. Whitlock was expanding the ranks... I was now officially invincible.

_Every broken enemy will know  
>That their opponent had to be invincible<em>

When Maria believed that Charlotte had completed her first year, I was ordered to kill her. Maria had also figured out that Peter was her mate, so I was told to kill him as well. I didn't even think twice about it. I let them go. I told them to run and never look back. It was now the year Peter had told me I'd escape, and the year was nearly over. I was beginning to lose hope again.

We had just won a battle and were told to prepare for another one before dawn. I was standing beside the barn that the newborns were in, deciding what I was going to do. It had been six years since I'd sent Peter and Charlotte away. I'd endured six more years with a hope that I'd find some indication that I could not only escape Maria but that I could escape war. I didn't want to kill anymore. Even with my vampire mind I'd lost count of the lives I'd ended. I couldn't even remember some of them because I'd committed them in an angry, red haze. I couldn't do this much longer. I knew that soon, I would welcome the Volturi's wrath, and that I would do anything I needed to in order to draw them straight to me.

_Take a last look around while your alive  
>I'm an indestructible master of war<em>

"It's been a long time, Major." I heard Peter's voice say, and I looked up to see him and Charlotte standing in the trees. They were smiling at me. She had no new scars, and neither did Peter. "Come on. We've found peace, and we want to share to with you."

I couldn't believe it. I didn't dare.

"Major, Peter told me that you had been waiting to leave this place for nine years." Charlotte spoke up. "No one fights for territory up North. You can talk to other vampires without fighting. We haven't ripped anyone apart in over six years."

"Peace." I whispered quietly, hardly remembering the meaning. I recalled a brief flash of myself as a human, riding a horse into town with another boy my age, and we were smiling. It took nothing more. I followed them into the trees. I never looked back.

Many years later, I left Peter and Charlotte's company. I was missing something, and even though Peter and Char had given me peace, there was something they couldn't give me. I still felt the emptiness expanding everytime I would feed and snap out of my bloodlust only to find myself alone in my grief for my prey.

It was a cloudy day in Philadelphia. I ducked into a diner as the clouds began thinning out. It was then that I came across a woman, and she skipped up to say hello.

"I saw you coming. I'm Alice." She said, her voice singing like a flute.

"I am Mars, the God of War." I smiled at her, and it was then that I knew. I would never leave this small woman's side. "You can call me Jasper."

"You kept me waiting long enough." She reprimanded gently, her emotions full of humor, excitement, love, and joy.

"My apologies, ma'am." I replied, and just like that, I was indestructible.

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><p><strong>A.N.: Surprise! This one has been sitting around getting edited whenever I happen to find it again. I read it last night and decided it was finally ready to be published. I adore this one-shot, and I am very proud of it. Tell me what you think, my lovelies!<strong>


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